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[02 Feb 2009|12:55am] |
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mood |
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 exhausted |
] |
Dear You,
Stop.
And smell the doughnuts.
xoxo,
me.
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[01 Feb 2009|04:18am] |
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mood |
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 awake |
] |
Dear You,
I have never brushed my teeth OR eaten so much fish in my entire life before now. I think i need a little while more to get used to this.
xoxo,
me.
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[11 Nov 2008|07:09pm] |
Dear You,
I was just reading back my blog with that what-the-fuck-are-you-talking-about look on my face and re-reading it again.
And again.
What the fuck are you talking about?!
Issues? What issues? Who said anything about issues?
OMG you *insert adjective* boy if you dont understand what youre reading then ASK!
Oh and by the way. If somewhere along your blog, a revelation hits you and you realise you 'dont bother' (apparently 'dont bother' has quite a different meaning to this individual, which i will mention later), then im sure your brain is capable of sending signals to your fingers to press that button labelled DELETE or move the cursor to that red button at the top corner of the page marked X.
AND YOU STILL SAY YOU DONT BOTHER! ROTFLOL!
Sure. That's why you dedicated a whole blog entry to me (im touched, really). That's why you play the you-better-distance-yourself-away-from-her-and-dont-talk-to-her-or-else-im-going-to-be-childish-with-you-which-is-nothing-new game with Her. Which, by the way again, is what i define as manipulative.
Pfft. But what do Little Miss Ditzy know, right? I probably got it all wrong according to you. Which is fine by me. Perfectly fine.
xoxo,
me.
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[03 Nov 2008|04:42pm] |
Dear You,
And im still amazed at what a walking contradiction you are. You cant be bothered? Hoho. Okay, if you insist. I'll just play along with your games.
xoxo,
me.
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[29 Oct 2008|04:46pm] |
Dear You,
Okay. Lets put things into perspective now.
Of course, to protect the (not so) innocent, names shall not be mentioned. So you either have to be very smart, or stuck in this shit hole, to know what im talking about.
Do you really wonder why people have such an orgasmic ERO (Eye Rolling Orgasm) when they see you? You got half a brain left, so come on. Think.
Firstly. It’s amazing really, watching you play your childish games. Because, for fuck’s sake, how old are you? And not to mention it’s pretty stupid to be playing them on your work mates. I mean, enlighten me, please. What were you thinking? Like, no shit Sherlock, they’re gonna figure it out sooner or later. Duh. (insert ERO here)
Secondly. Your assumptions. Your presumptuous assumptions. Let me just let you in on a secret okay? The world does not revolve around you. Believe it or not! Everything must always have something to do with you. Everything. You talk as if everyone around you have an ulterior motive or plotting something behind your back. (insert ERO here) Please. Do we really look like we care? We’ve got a lot more important things to do like painting our toe nails pink.
Thirdly. Stand in front of the mirror and take a good hard look at yourself. Whatever you accused another of, you were once there before and still are. Immature. Pathetic. Manipulative. A walking mess.
Let me sum it up okay?
You’re annoying. That’s why people don’t talk to you. Nothing more, nothing less. So stop assuming the worst out of people, Because really, we just don’t care that much about you.
No hard feelings, yeah?
xoxo,
me.
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[17 Oct 2008|01:31am] |
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mood |
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 sleepy |
] |
Dear You,
You know what you need? ALL of you?
A fucking tight slap on the face.
xoxo,
me.
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[13 Sep 2008|01:11am] |
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mood |
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 sad |
] |
Dear You,
I used to love this job and its people with all my heart and soul. There was a time when I didn’t have to sacrifice personal space for work, which made me fall even deeper in love with my job. There was a time when waking up for work was so easy, even when it was five in the morning to make it on time for evac practices. There was a time when I didn’t have to compensate on doing what I want because my job gave me the freedom to do both. The people I worked with weren’t colleagues – they were friends. Because friends don’t talk behind your back and calculate the number of leaves you take and assume you are skiving when really, your dad is going in and out of hospital, for the love of god.
If the blame is to be put on the responsibility of moving up to a higher position, then please take it away from me. The responsibility was supposed to be challenge, not a chore. The responsibility should never have to make a person choose between personal space and work, to a point where your happiness is a compromise. The responsibility should never transform a person to be calculative just because everyone around is.
It’s hard to say goodbye, but it’s time that I should – to the memories that will never be alive again.
xoxo,
me.
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[19 May 2008|08:07pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
] |
Dear You,
Sometimes we find ourselves stuck in a very compromising position. Most of the time, we have love (or passion, lust, infatuation, whatever else) to blame. I don't mean butt-naked-penis-in-pussy-and-mother-at-the-door kind of situation, though we all don't want to be there when THAT happens.
So what? We give ourselves a one month probation period and then walk away? We say we're happy for them but cry inside? We tell ourselves this will be the last time but let the vicious cycle happen all over again? We shut the other person out?
I guess love is only worth fighting for when you find a reason to. But then again, do we need a reason to love? And when that reason is gone, do we then stop loving?
xoxo,
me.
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[26 Apr 2008|10:46am] |
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mood |
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 hungry |
] |
Peti kayu ibuku – a poignant reminiscing of days long gone by a woman as she goes through her mother’s wooden chest and the sentimental things kept inside.
First staged almost ten years ago, Ekamatra revisited this play to commemorate their 20th anniversary. I didn’t manage to watch their first staging. But this being an anniversary piece, I thought it would be nice to have some nostalgia left behind in each piece that was revisited – and expected that. I expected the actress to be more woeful at times when sentiments hit the heart, and I expected the set to resemble that of a wooden chest. I mean, what else right?
It was more abstract than I expected.
And I thought, okay. Maybe Ekamatra wanted to revisit old pieces but reshape it into something more modern, more contemporary. It is, after all, twenty long years. And yes, the director did a good job at that, but…
You know how P. Ramlee films just won’t work with colours?
Precisely.
Well, let’s just have common, unknown faces like me keep their five cents worth to themselves.
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[31 Mar 2008|01:43am] |
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mood |
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tired |
] |
Dear You,
A pile of bills lie beside me - all unopened. For weeks, heck, months perhaps.
Sometimes, just sometimes, I wish there was someone paying for everything for me instead.
xoxo,
me.
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[29 Feb 2008|11:52pm] |
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mood |
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 sick |
] |
Dear You,
A leap year just means my pay will come in one day later.
Bummer.
xoxo,
me.
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[26 Feb 2008|12:15am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 loved |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Sara Bareilles - Love Song |
] |
I'm not gonna write you a love song,
'Cause you asked for it,
'Cause you need one, you see.
I'm not gonna write you a love song,
'Cause you tell me it's,
Make or breaking this.
If you’re on your way,
I'm not gonna write you to stay.
If all you have is leaving,
I’m gonna need a better reason to write you a love song today.
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[05 Jan 2008|12:33am] |
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mood |
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tired |
] |
Dear You,
I think the day I lost my innocence was the day I started to question.
xoxo,
me.
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[31 Dec 2007|02:33am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 blank |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The Dresden Dolls - Coin-operated Boy |
] |
...that is why i want a coin-operated boy
with a pretty coin-operated voice
saying that he loves me
that he's thinking of me
straight up to the point
that is why i want a
coin-operated boy
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[11 Dec 2007|11:03pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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sleepy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Ingrid Michaelson - The Way I Am |
] |
Dear You,
I just realised how potent an insecurity can be. And deadlier still when you can do nothing about it. Or can you, now? Which is more lethal? Someone who has everything to lose, or someone who has nothing to lose? Go figure.
Fuck, I have no idea what I'm talking about. I think it's about time I got myself some morphine shots. Just to get me through Life. Oh, and some sleep too.
Yeah, I think that's just what I need, besides You. Sleep.
Cuz I love you more than I could ever promise.
And you take me the way I am.
xoxo,
me.
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[22 Nov 2007|01:43am] |
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mood |
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 determined |
] |
Have you ever tried to fit into my shoes?
I don't think you ever reach the finish line
Where I'll be waiting
Where I'll be standing
Just looking at you
Can you see what Im trying to say
Can you see what Im trying to do
Im trying to make the best one does for me and you...
Awun. I love you. Okay? I guess that's all that matters when I cant seem to find the right words. When I cant seem to read you. When I can feel you pushing me away.
I Love You.
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[09 Nov 2007|03:40am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 fucked up |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Melee - Built To Last |
] |
Dear You, I misplaced hope. Somewhere between your drunken stupor and the cold reality of your ignorance. And if you ever find it, dont return it. I cant take the disappointment anymore. xoxo,
me.
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[13 Oct 2007|04:02am] |
| [ |
mood |
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crappy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Fastball - The Way |
] |
Hey Dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according to plan?
Do you think I’m wasting
My time doing things I wanna do?
But it hurts when you
Disapprove all along
And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I’m never gonna be good enough for you
I can’t pretend that I’m alright
And you can’t change me
‘Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect
Now it’s just too late
And we can’t go back
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect
I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days you spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don’t care anymore
And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I’m never gonna be good enough for you
I can’t stand another fight
And nothing’ alright
‘Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect
Now it’s just too late
And we can’t go back
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect
Nothing’s gonna change
The things that you said
Nothing’s gonna make this right again
Please don’t turn your back
I can’t believe it’s hard just to talk to you
But you don’t understand
‘Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I’m sorry5
I can’t be Perfect
Now it’s just too late
And we can’t go back
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect
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[06 Oct 2007|01:15am] |
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music |
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Thrice - Send Me An Angel |
] |
Dear You,
It's only the start of October, and I have already made resolutions for next year. Of course, these wont be done until the new year starts. But that's besides the point.
I bought myself a spanking new moleskin weekly planner. I missed my secondary/jc days when updating my planner was a religious affair. I HAD to, cuz I never could remember what was due when. But a few years down the road, it's nice to be able to look through and reminisce. And I want to start back the habit, penning down appointments and to-do lists, notes and birthdays, travel (mis)adventures and doodles. And somewhere between the pages, I'll slot in a picture or two, movie stubs and performance tickets. Yeah, that'll be sweet. And unlike most new year resolutions, this doesn't sound too ambitious.
xoxo,
me.
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